“How does she do it?”
“How do you balance your time as a mother with being a blogger?”
“…with working full-time outside the home?”
“…with being a wife?”
These questions are asked, time and again, of every mother. How do you balance your time between being a mother and insert-other-description-here?
I’m not really asked any version of this question. Probably because they typically ask it of mothers who at least appear to have “it” all together.
I am not one of those mothers.
And that’s okay. Really, it is.
But it crosses my mind all the time.
How do I do it? How am I supposed to make this all work? How am I supposed to be a loving and caring mother, a dedicated and loyal employee, an entertaining and talented writer/blogger? How am I supposed to juggle all these parts of who I am, without letting any of them drop?
I fail. A lot. Sometimes I find myself typing frantically at the computer, trying to get a story out or a blog post written, while T is watching a movie or playing in his room by himself. I work full-time, so that is 40+ hours a week I cannot devote to my son or to a career I really want – editor, writer, that sort of thing.
For the most part, I’ve come to terms with it. I let some things fall. I’ll go several days without posting a new blog or writing anything on my stories, because I’d rather take an evening walk with T and go to bed at the same time as him so we can snuggle. I’m learning to live with my life as it is. I still struggle; I still get depressed. I still feel like I’m not doing enough. But, for the most part, I know I’m doing the best I can. I can’t berate myself.
But then I get to thinking about the things I am not successfully balancing. At all.
My social/dating life. The continued education I would really like. Exercising on a regular basis.
These are the things I’m letting fall by the wayside.
But do I have to? Should I have to? There are thousands of single mothers out there who are in shape, have successful careers or attend classes to better themselves, maintain great relationships with their friends, and even (gasp) date.
How do they do it?
When we all have the same number of hours in a week, how do they manage to play with their children, work (sometimes more than one job), stay in shape, see their friends, go on dates, go grocery shopping, remember to get an oil change, schedule and get to doctor/dentist appointments, take showers more than twice a week, dress in beautiful coordinated outfits, do their hair and makeup every morning, remember to pay the bills on time? How?
I’m not complaining.
I’m seriously asking.
Where in the world do these people find the time?
And please don’t tell me I have to wake up at 4:30am and go to bed after midnight.
I’m tired enough as it is.
And even getting up at 6am is getting difficult after only being up until 10pm.