Songs will catch me off guard, always.
I’ll be enjoying my evening, my iTunes playlist on shuffle, and suddenly I’ll hear the first few chords.
Sometimes I’ll trip over myself trying to get to the computer to hit STOP as quickly as possible.
Other times, I’ll let it play and allow the song to take me back.
I have a terrible memory, so I attach specific songs, artists, albums to events or people in my life. If I need help jump-starting a memory, sometimes all it takes is to play a certain song.
It isn’t just one song, really. There are so many. There’s the Martina McBride that I played when my heart was first broken. The MxPx one that we said was “ours”. Or an entire CD played, on repeat, driving over Mount Rose from Tahoe to Reno, while we sang at the top of our lungs.
That’s the one I like to hear the most.
It’s difficult growing older, growing up, growing apart.
But whenever I find myself missing her, all I have to do is toss in P!nk’s Missundaztood album and crank up the volume. I sing at the top of my lungs, remembering each lyric that would make us laugh, or the lyrics we would change to match our own experiences. I remember what she looked like, in the passenger seat of my Explorer deemed “Eddie”. Each song brings about a new emotion, until sometimes I feel like crying. I miss those times so much.
But we have grown older, grown up, grown apart.
There are new songs, new associations I’m making. New surprises when the iTunes playlist is on shuffle.
And one day I’ll be able to make a playlist starting from my youth and traveling through each new stage of my life. Different artists, different genres, all tying together my past into a neat little package.
The playlist would most likely be able to go on for weeks without repeating a song.
This week’s RemembeRED memoir prompt was to write a post about a sound or scent that brings you right back to your past.