April Fool’s Day (or, Should we really be OK with anything our child does?)

I typically do not participate in April Fool’s Day.

When I was in Junior High, one of my best friends came to school literally crying and telling me that her parents were getting a divorce and she was going to have to move away. We stood there, in tears, for several minutes until she suddenly looked up at me with an evil smile…

APRIL FOOL’S!

I was so upset with her over that joke. I kind of held on to it for a long time. I hated that day because I hate falling for that kind of stuff. It always made me feel kind of stupid.

And then I got over it. So I decided to play my FIRST EVER April Fool’s joke. Just, you know, for fun. Not even believing anybody would fall for it.

I first considered announcing my pregnancy, but that seems to be really common. (On a side note, my dear friend did call me today to tell me she’s pregnant. Except, she really is. She called me after I’d posted on Twitter that I really wanted someone to announce a real pregnancy on April 1st. And she’s not even on Twitter. Spooky, right?).

Instead, I posted the following status on Facebook (which is populated by almost my entire extended family and many good friends):

[Ex-husband] and I ran off to get married again last night. It’s really in the best interest of [the kiddo]. I hope we continue to have the love and support of all our friends and family.

The first response I got was a text message from my sister, five minutes after the posting. Hey πŸ™‚ I just read your post on facebook. Is this an april fools joke or are you serious? If its serious im really happy for you πŸ™‚ i love you cissy. [transcribed verbatim, grammar mistakes and all]

I immediately sent back APRIL FOOLS and she told me she thought so but her husband really believed it. My friend (a former co-worker who was with me through the divorce) sent pretty much the same text message a little bit later.

Then another friend posted a comment on my Facebook status with a “Happy April Fool’s Day!” but I thought it was too soon, so I deleted her comment. She said she understood because she thought it was pretty funny.

And then, my dad’s cousin (who really only knows me through Facebook, so is forgiven) told me that it didn’t matter as long as I was happy. Which was kind of an interesting comment, because didn’t I say it was for the best interest of the kid? Whatever. He can take a joke. Once he knew it was a joke.

Many of my other friends got the joke right away. Either because they were aware of the day, or know that I would never re-marry the ex-husband.

But then one of my friends, a girl who I was super close to in college, said congratulations.

I was shocked. Shocked, I tell you. I told her to look at the calendar, and she figured it out. She gave the excuse that she’s a stay-at-home mom so she doesn’t pay attention to the day (trust me, I totally get it!).

But then?

I got a phone call.

From my mom.

She basically gave her blessing on the whole thing. And she didn’t know what had happened in the last month (since I saw her last) but that she was happy for me.

WHAT?

Is my mother on drugs?


I said, Mom. April Fool’s. And then I burst into laughter.

She did not think it was very funny. I couldn’t stop laughing.

Well I wondered why you would post it on Facebook and not call me. But I thought maybe you were just afraid of people’s reactions.

And I just laughed.

I think it irked her. She called me a jerk in a playful tone, but I’m still not sure. She laughed a little bit before we hung up. But still…

Maybe one of these days I will write a post about being a parent and how accepting of your children’s choices you should be.

When I told her I was pregnant (23, fresh out of college, unwed, dating about 6 months), she was immediately excited and happy for me. (She also called my boyfriend the next day to welcome him to the family, even though I hadn’t said anything about us getting married).

When I told her we went to the courthouse to get married and were not going to have a ceremony or reception as previously thought, she was so happy for me.

When I (jokingly) said I was going to re-marry my ex-husband only for the “best interest” of my kid, she was ready to accept that was my choice and she was happy for me.

And it’s not just me. She does this with my siblings as well. No matter what happens, she is immediately accepting of any ridiculous thing we do (ok, my two examples aren’t really ridiculous but whatever. I have more extreme examples from my siblings, but I don’t want to share too much…).

I feel like I could rob a bank and my mom would just be like, okay, I just want you to be happy.

How accepting is too accepting when you are a parent?

If your daughter re-marries someone with whom she was unhappy with, only in the supposed best interest of her child, when she just told you a month ago that she was totally depressed because she was still living with her ex-husband, should you really congratulate her? Or should you be trying to find her some professional help?

Where is the line?

Also?

I guess I don’t have to write a post later about this topic, because I pretty much just said what’s on my mind regarding it.

And that is that.

I love my mom very much. She just worried me a little bit.

I think I’m over April Fool’s again. I’ll try again in another sixteen years.

Oh, did I tell you that I’m the mother of Wolverine?
April Fool’s!
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